Why Do We Take Things Personally

Why Do We Take Things Personally (and How to Stop)

Hey there, friends! 😊 Today, we (Neha & Noah) are going to chat about something super important – taking things personally. You know, that feeling when someone says something, and it just sticks in your mind like a stubborn stain? We’ve all been there. But why does it happen? And how can we stop it? Let’s dive in!

A Little Story – Learning the Hard Way

Neha: You know, I (Neha) once had a tough time while living in Qatar for 18 months. I was there on a mission, trying to speak Arabic – but trust me, my Arabic was not perfect. 😅 Once, I tried to tell a friend, "I’m just trying to support you." But I messed up and said, "I’m just trying to put up with you." Ouch!

Noah: And that’s not all. One day, her friend told her, "You've gained a lot of weight, haven't you?" Neha was shocked and hurt. But then the friend added, "And you take offense very easily." Double ouch!

Neha: Looking back, I now understand that taking things personally is like carrying around a little storm inside. But I also learned how to calm that storm. And that’s what we’re going to share with you.

 Why Do We Take Things Personally?

Taking things personally is a common problem, and it often happens because of two main reasons:

1. **We Assume Too Much:** We think we know what the other person is thinking. We believe they are attacking us. But most of the time, they are not.

2. **Our Own Insecurities:** If we are already unsure about something – like our looks, skills, or worth – even a small comment can feel like a huge attack.

1. **நாம் அதிகமாக எண்ணுகிறோம்:** மற்றவர் என்ன நினைக்கிறார்கள் என்று நாம் நினைக்கிறோம். அவர்கள் எங்களைத் தாக்குகிறார்கள் என்று நம்புகிறோம். ஆனால் பெரும்பாலும், அவர்கள் அப்படியே இல்லை.

2. **எமது அச்சங்கள்:** எங்களின் தோற்றம், திறமை அல்லது மதிப்பு குறித்த சந்தேகம் இருந்தால், ஒரு சிறிய கருத்தும் பெரிய தாக்கம் போல் உணரப்படும்.

 Understanding Our Stories

Neha: You know, I used to think my friend was insulting me in Qatar. But later, I realized it was just a cultural difference. In her culture, commenting on appearance was normal and even a way to show they care!

Noah: It’s all about the stories we tell ourselves. If we change the story in our head, we change how we feel.

How Can We Stop Taking Things Personally?

1. **Clarity – Check Your Stories:** When someone says something, ask yourself, "Am I making this a big deal because of my own insecurities?"

2. **Boundaries – Know What’s Yours:** Don’t try to control other people’s thoughts or actions. Focus on what you can control – your own reactions.

3. **Self-Worth – Build Your Inner Confidence:** Remind yourself of your strengths. Accept that you’re not perfect, and that’s okay!

1. **தெளிவு – உங்கள் கதைகளைச் சரிபார்க்கவும்:** ஒருவர் ஏதேனும் சொன்னால், "நான் இந்ததை எனது அச்சம் காரணமாக பெரிதாக்குகிறேனா?" என்று கேளுங்கள்.

2. **எல்லைகள் – உங்கள் பகுதியை அறிவீர்:** மற்றவர்களின் சிந்தனை அல்லது செயலைக் கட்டுப்படுத்த முயற்சிக்காதீர்கள். உங்கள் செயல்களை மட்டும் கவனியுங்கள்.

3. **சுய மதிப்பு – உங்களை உள்ளிருந்து உறுதிப்படுத்துங்கள்:** உங்கள் பலங்களை நினைவுகூருங்கள். நீங்கள் சிறந்தவராக இருக்க வேண்டியதில்லை, அதற்குத் தேவை இல்லை!

 Final Thoughts – Don’t Be Too Hard on Yourself

Neha: Taking things personally is a habit, but it’s one we can change.

Noah: So next time someone says something, take a deep breath. Think, "Is this really about me?" Most of the time, it isn’t.

Neha & Noah: Remember, you are amazing just as you are. Keep growing, keep learning, and don’t let little comments pull you down. 💖

Let us know in the comments! And don’t forget to follow our blog for more useful tips! 😍

With love,

Neha & Noah ❤️